1/15/08 Hazelnuts My Ass

Today I bought a coffee locally.
I thought it would taste better.
It actually tasted like hazelnut flavoring,
which I didn't order and don't like.
But it did taste better to my conscience.

I drank it and thought about hazelnuts,
or filberts, as they are sometimes called,
or empty ernies, as my parents made me
believe they were called when I was little.
Lying to children is always good. And funny.

I used to live in the hazelnut capital
of either the country or the world.
Either way, impressive. Springfield, Oregon.
I never saw a single hazelnut there.

I would have thought that the hazelnut capital
of the country or the world would be full of hazelnuts.
That everything would be built out of them.
Or at least that there would be one hazelnut structure.

Like the corn palace.
Hazelnut city hall.
Or hazelnut mini golf.
I mean, Jesus Christ.
Walk the talk, Springfield.